Friends at Church

When I was a kid, we used to sing this song that said, "I'm so glad I'm a part of the family of God..."

I've spent the last 10 years trying desperately to regain my gusto for those particular words.  Every time I've come close, there's been some stumbling block.  Generally, it is one of "God's wonderful people."  If I could rewrite that song from childhood, I think it would start out, "I'm surprised you're a part of the family of God."  I'm not trying to be critical or throw the Church at-large under the proverbial bus, this is just the fact of my experience.

I'm not even going to expound too much about this because it's just divisive, ungodly and sad.

When we moved to Colorado, we were committed to finding a church to worship and serve in and (if absolutely necessary) build some relationships.  We were shocked when we realized that we really like these people...Don't misunderstand me, like any group, our church has its share of miscreants, misfits and oddballs. I'm not saying that I'd like to be intimately acquainted with every single person there.  But there are a lot of friendly, loving and authentic people in our church.

We joined a small group with a real international flair, which is cool because refreshments at our group meetings might include snacks from Britain, Ireland, India or Iran...we even had jalepeno poppers one week...we always have a selection of English teas, served hot.  It's a far cry from the last church we attended where everyone was white, middle-class and drove a Honda.  And we love the people in the group; unimposing, gracious, wonderful people.  Our community group night is something that we've grown to look forward to.

Tonight, when I was putting our two-year-old to bed, she kept saying, "I want to see my friends."  Which is her way of saying that she wants to go to church.  It was the thing that we said to her in the early days there, when we were trying to convince her to go to Sunday School..."Don't you want to see your friends?  If you go in there, you can play with your friends." 

Later, I was thinking about how I feel about going to church.  I understand the consternation that some people feel about churches that are "social clubs," I've made that same criticism from time to time.  There are essential elements of church life: sound teaching, worship, etc.  But the thing I've been missing is real fellowship, real community.

Somewhere along the line, the church (and I'm referring mainly to the fundamentalist church in the US) got so interested in being the sin-police that we traded the compassion and mercy that was so evident in Christ's relationships with people for the judgement and condemnation of the Pharisees.  Real fellowship and community became impossible because everyone has to put on a good show.  Real worship is stifled in this environment as well.  And all of the sound teaching is just a clanging cymbal.

But something has changed for me.  I feel a freedom with these people that I haven't felt since college.  I've stepped beyond the religious notion that I ought to go to church.  I'm not just going to get my "spiritual batteries recharged" or put in my due time.  I don't merely want to receive teaching or worship.  All of these reasons for going to church are valid to some extent.  But there really is more that God had in mind when He put the church together.  He knows that we need the support and love of other Christ-followers; that we need community. 

So, I realized that I want to see my friends...and that's a good reason to go to church too.